Society of Culture and Welfare

Our neighbors, who have become advocates of helping people get on the home security bandwagon at every opportunity they can muster, are having a cookout for anyone in our neighborhood who want to come.  They have gotten the home back together after being burglarized and vandalized a while ago.  They are happy to be back in their home, and are very pleased with how safe they feel in their newly remodel space.   They told us that they have been looking at business security systems for their flower and candy shop.  They believe they should upgrade what they currently have.  It’s been such an eye opener for us all to see what happened to their home.  We should do all we can to make sure we are secure as we can be at home and at work.  Things have changed a great deal over the years, and they is nowhere you should feel safe enough to not lock your doors, even if you are going next door for a quick minute.  Our neighbors are bound to have a great turnout for their cookout.  Everyone in the neighborhood will most likely come.  They are hoping for a good turnout, and from the buzz, it seems they may just get their wish.

I am a personal injury attorney in New York.  What a humdinger of a case I’ve just been given!  Some high-society dingbat gave a big party on Central Park West last Saturday evening.  It was some kind of fund-raiser for the Heart Association, something like that, really doesn’t matter, now does it?  In any case, Joe X attended this party with a date, and they were in the kitchen pouring some wine or something, and they both heard a scream coming from the balcony.  You know—one of those expansive Central Park West balconies that’s almost half the size of the apartments in the buildings.  Joe went over to see what had happened, pushing his way through the party crowds, and sees Jane Y howling in pain, clutching the sides of her face.  She had apparently just been smacked—REALLY HARD—by Jim Z, her sometime lover.  Now this is secondhand, but Jim Z must have told Joe later that he was making wisecracks at Jane’s expense.  Jane, already plowed, got indignant and dared to start insulting him, which I guess is verboten when you’re dealing with Big Jim (the Big Him).  That was when he socked her.  It seems that our Jim doesn’t know his own strength.  Next Joe started to fight him, but was restrained by both his date and a few of the other guests.  Jim stormed into the kitchen, Jane, in tears, called a taxicab to come and relieve her so she could go home and apply an ice pack, and Joe and his date stayed at the party, but he made sure to call me first thing Monday morning; the rest, my friend, will be courtroom history!

The treatment for hair loss is different for each person. I have heard them all. There is the stuff you rub on your head. Then there were the plugs. Those looked really funny. I would never get those; I'd rather just shave my head and call it a day. Lately, there are the hair follicle treatments. Those seem to be the most promising. You get taken care of microscopically, I guess, with little of the plugging look like before. In fact, Joe had this done, and he actually looks pretty good. He looks like he did twenty years ago, which is with a full head of hair. I recently saw him at the airport, and I swear I thought I had gone back in time. Mary, Joe's sister, had it done too. Must be they have genetic hair loss. She looks good too, so I guess this is the way to go. I have a little thinning, but not enough to even think about undergoing this. Maybe in a few years if it keeps up. Maybe not. It all depends.

Grandma spends a lot of time in her kitchen.  She loves to cook, even though she says she cooks to make sure whoever eats her food will get a healthy portion.  She makes going out to eat boring.  Whenever we think about going out to eat, our thoughts always turn to Grandma.  Not only can she cook, but she tells wonderful stories while you are performing whatever chore she gives you, and you don’t even feel you’ve done any work at all.  My Grandfather usually sits at the kitchen table with his newspaper and cup of tea.  We are always after him to remember to use his blood glucose monitor every morning.  He has kind of a hefty appetite and is always nibbling, even after Grandma cooks in a good healthy breakfast.  He insists on eating bacon, but Grandma will not cook it.  Now and them she give him a couple slices of turkey bacon, which he enjoys.  Grandma says Grandpa thinks bacon is bacon, and does not make the distinction between turkey bacon and just plain ordinary bacon that we get when Mom and me go out for breakfast.  I think Grandma’s bacon taste much better than the restaurant’s.

My wife and I debated this for hours on end.  We drank gallons and gallons of coffee to stay up into the wee hours just to decide on a Kolcraft baby organizer.  Actually, we didn’t.  It just felt that way to me.  Don’t get me wrong.  I think a Kolcraft baby organizer is a fine product and should help a great deal once little Daniel is born.  I just don’t see the difference between that and any other baby organizer.  But my wife is my wife.  I love her to death and don’t know what I’d ever do without her, but she has to micro-manage everything down to the minutest detail.  It helps when we’re doing our taxes or something like or it’s really funny when she points out all the not so obvious little historical inaccuracies on the big HBO dramas like Rome or The Tudors on Showtime.  I understand that we’re having a child and I’m really nervous too, but that doesn’t mean we should be overreacting to every little thing.  Come on.  This is a whole new life we’re starting together.  We should at least be a little excited too.  We’ll be good parents.  I know it.